


At The Turn Of The Tide

by Kerkerian



Category: MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: Adult Adoption, Alcohol, Angst, Breakup, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode Fix-it, Episode: s05e05 Jack + Kinematics + Safe Cracker + MgKNO3 + GTO, Fix It, Fluff and Humor, Friendship/Love, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hospital, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Jack Lives, Jack Whump, Jack approves, Jack comes back, Lots of tears, Mac Whump, MacRiley on the horizon, Papa Jack, Platonic Bed Sharing, Platonic Cuddling, Protective Jack, Team as Family, accidental substance abuse, injuries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-23
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-15 11:55:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28938129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kerkerian/pseuds/Kerkerian
Summary: Her thoughts stray back to Mac, who should have known this first. Who was so terribly lifeless in her arms earlier, in the car, and she just hopes that he'll make it through this, that the first thing she'll have to tell Jack won't be that he just missed his boy by a day.
Relationships: Jack Dalton & Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016), Jack Dalton (MacGyver TV 2016) & Riley Davis, Riley Davis & Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016), Wilt Bozer & Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016)
Comments: 68
Kudos: 123





	1. The Darkness

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own MacGyver.

Riley opens her eyes and blinks into the twilight of dusk. For a moment, she just stays where she is, on her couch, huddled into the Dallas Cowboys snuggie that's still faintly smelling of Jack, and watches the shadows creeping into corners.

It's been a week since she learned she's now the proud owner of Jack's GTO; a week that felt surreal at best. She's cried so much by now that her eyes are permanently burning, and she still can't accept their loss. She'd give up the car in a heartbeat if only she got her quasi-dad back. The man who was like a rock for her when everything else in life was unreliable.

Riley huffs: there were times when she thought he'd abandoned her, and it had hit her hard. Which is why she didn't make it easy for him when they were finally back in each other's lives, and now she wishes that they had talked sooner. That she had given him a chance when he tried to explain, briefly after he and her mum had split up. He tried to call her repeatedly, sent her texts asking to meet him at the arcade, but she ignored him. She was stupid, plain and simple.

She should have known him better, should have guessed that there was a deeper reason for him to leave her mum. Instead, she had shut him out.

Taking a shuddering breath, she quickly sits up and turns on a lamp: she's close to tears again, and she's tired. She wishes she could get all those lost years back and give them to him. She wishes she could talk to him just one last time, tell him how sorry she was. How inconsolable. How much she loved him.

With a heavy heart and brimming eyes, she gets up and pads into the kitchen to get a glass of water. It's Saturday and she hasn't done anything all day except for moping around in her sweats and napping on the couch. She glances at her phone which she left on the kitchen worktop: there are a few new messages. She taps on the folder irritably; she isn't in the mood for other people. If this is her aunt sending her another cat video, she'll break something.

One message is from Mac, however. Riley frowns and picks up the phone: it's a picture of a baseball cap, Jack's favourite. Mac's text is strange: _Forgot its still hear. Stuff everywhere. Can't_.

It's not like Mac to make mistakes like that. Or write something like that.

Riley's got a bad feeling about it, so she calls Mac, but it goes straight to voicemail, and he doesn't pick up on the landline either. Chewing her lip, she opens her rig and locates Mac's phone; it's at his house, so presumably, he is as well, which only increases her apprehension. So she hurries to get dressed, then she takes the car keys- of her regular car, not the GTO, because she doesn't think she can handle that right now- and heads out of the door.

It's dark by the time she reaches Hollywood Hills, and so is Mac's house. Riley rings the doorbell and knocks, but he doesn't open. His car's there though. Maybe he's gone for a run? Probably not in the dark, though.

“Mac!” she calls. “It's me!”

When that doesn't elicit a reaction, she tries the handle and realizes that the door isn't locked. Which doesn't bode well and comes as a bit of a surprise these days; Mac has actually gotten better at locking up after himself. Pointedly not thinking of what Jack would say to this, Riley lets herself in: “Mac?”

She finds him in the kitchen, passed out on the floor with his torso half leaning against one of the cabinets. Even before she crouches down next to him, she can smell the odour of alcohol and see the empty bottle next to him. Vodka, from the looks of it.

“Mac!” She slaps him on the cheek, at which he groans and turns his head away.

Riley persists though, slapping him again: “Mac! Wake up!”

Groaning again, Mac blinks and mumbles something unintelligible, but he doesn't wake up. Riley slaps him harder, at which his eyes finally fly open; she breathes a silent sigh of relief, feeling shaky.

“Mac!” she says again. “You with me?”

“Riles?” he slurs. “Whaddayadoin'ere?”

She's never seen him like this. It's scary, and it's making her angry.

“What are _you_ doing?” she asks, pushing her hands under his shoulders. “Can you get up?”

He tries to bat her arms away, but his motions are too uncoordinated: “Don't...”

“Fine. You want me to call an ambulance?”

He grunts: “Don'needamulance.”

“Really? I'm not so sure. Now help me, 'kay? Try to get up.”

It's like trying to get an octopus to stand up. Mac flounders and slips from her grasp a few times. When Riley finally manages to get him into a remotely upright position, they are both breathing heavily.

Somehow, they negotiate their way to Mac's bedroom, crashing into things a few times because Mac isn't able to walk in a straight line, and Riley can't slow down in order not to lose any momentum.

In his room, Mac pulls towards the bed, but Riley expected this and keeps a firm grip on him, heading straight for the bathroom, because Mac's begun to breathe funnily through his nose, and she can guess what that means. And really- they're barely through the door when he starts retching, probably courtesy of being upright and moving.

Afraid that he might fall and hit his head if he bends over too far, Riley makes a split-second decision and hauls Mac into the shower. Not a second too late; he falls to his knees, pulling her with him, and throws up.

It's all Riley can do to keep her balance and hold on to Mac to support him, because he's shaking by now.

Once the bout is over, he sags and would have lain down on the tiles if Riley weren't still holding him.

“No lying down yet,” she says, tugging until he sits almost upright, leaning against the tiles by the door so he won't get wet. With one hand, she keeps him from sliding sideways, with the other, she turns on the water to wash the vomit away. Once the shower stall is clean, Riley regards Mac: he's chalk white and still shaking, and his eyes are closed again. His face is covered by a fine sheen of cold sweat.

Never letting go of him, Riley reaches for a towel and uses it to wipe the sweat and some spit off: “You still with me, Mac?” she asks.

Mac moans, forcing his bloodshot eyes open and immediately tries to curl up, his arms around himself.

“Hey, look at me!” Riley shakes his shoulder non too gently, forcing him to stay upright. “Mac, hey!”

Instead of an answer, Mac begins to retch again. This time, Riley lets go of him as he lunges sideways; he's going to get wet, but at least he's not too out of it not to realize what's going on.

When it's over, Mac just scoots backwards a little and lowers himself onto the tiles.

“Oh no, you can't just stay like that.” Riley pushes and pulls until Mac complies, then she helps him up once more, wiping his face with the towel just as before and letting the water run for a moment. Mac's skin is clammy, and he's wet anyway, so it doesn't matter. Nor does she care that she's getting wet as well.

She props him up against the wall and tries to rouse him a little further; and he moans again, sounding pitiful.

“I know you're feeling awful,” Riley says, “but you can't go to sleep now.”

To her dismay, Mac's face scrunches up, and then he takes a deep, shuddering breath, his eyes brimming: “Failed'im,” he slurs, starting to sob, and Riley feels her own eyes moistening up as well. She already figured that this is about Jack, but this is the first time that Mac lost his composure like this in her presence. He had kept it together almost too well during the past two weeks; apparently, he has now reached his breaking point.

“You didn't,” she whispers, cupping Mac's face with both hands. “Listen to me, Mac. You didn't fail him.”

“Did. H'called... missed...”

Mac's eyes are mere slits as he's looking at her now, weeping helplessly, and she feels her heart constrict. Despite his wet clothes, she pulls him into her arms, and he all but sags against her, sobbing uncontrollably now, and so does she. She cries for Jack and for herself and for Mac who's lost yet another person within such a short amount of time. She cries because of everything that Jack endured in the past few years and everything he couldn't have; he'll never drive his beloved car again or drink a beer with them or watch his favourite movie on Mac's couch or play skee-ball with her. Such small, modest pleasures for someone who constantly put the welfare of others before his own.

She cries because she's not sure she can go on like this, knowing how Jack's life ended; she cries because Mac feels too vulnerable in her arms, and from what she saw just now, he's stopped eating again, and she can't bear the notion of him wasting away in front of her eyes, consumed by his grief and misplaced feeling of guilt.

When their tears finally abate, they stay like that for some time. Riley feels unable to move, but there's something else: Mac is becoming increasingly heavy.

“Mac,” she says softly, pulling back far enough to look at him. At first she thinks he has fallen asleep, but then she realizes that he's passed out. Panic surges through her. She eases him onto the tiles and puts him in the recovery position, then she runs into the kitchen where her bag's still lying. As she digs around for her phone with trembling hands, she notices something else: an empty tablet tube. Mac sometimes suffers from migraine-like headaches, and these are the pills Dr. Sinderby prescribed him for it. On the floor, there's an empty blister packet of sleeping pills.

“Oh God,” Riley murmurs, then she picks up her phone. There are a few missed calls, but she's got to ignore them for now; she needs an ambulance. She can't carry Mac to the car, and this is beyond her control now.

She's just about to dial emergency services when there's a sound from the front door; a moment later, it opens, and Bozer comes in: “Mac?”

“Boze!” Riley all but sobs. “Thank God! We need to get Mac to Medical!”

“What?” Bozer just follows her as she runs back to the bathroom. “Riley! What happened? Oh no, oh Mac...”

Mac hasn't moved in the meantime, looking pallid and lifeless. She crouches down next to him again and searches for his pulse, which is there, if a little thready: “I found him in the kitchen, drunk off his head. He threw up a few times, but he passed out afterwards. I think he took these pills-” She shows him the empty tablet tube and the blister packet she found.

“You think he took both?”

“Yeah.”

Bozer looks shocked, but he helps Riley to pull Mac up and carry him outside. He remains unresponsive even as they haul him into the backseat of Bozer's car. Riley climbs in with him and holds on to him so she can keep checking his pulse; she tries to rouse him a few times as well, to no avail.

In the meantime, Bozer calls Phoenix and has them patch him through to Medical to alert Dr. Sinderby they're incoming, therefore, a team is awaiting them outside as they pull up.

Bozer and Riley follow them as Mac is being taken up to the infirmary, but they've got to wait outside as Mac's being assessed.

Riley feels as though someone's punched her in the guts. She stares at the doors behind which everyone's disappeared and can't help the fresh tears that are welling up in her eyes.

Bozer puts his arms around her, entirely lost for words.

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There'll be more tags added as we go along, but I feel like it'd give too much away at this point.


	2. Arrival + White Lies + Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the lovely feedback!  
> This story kind of ran away with me and I was busy with it all last week in between work and RL stuff, so I really appreciate your kudos/kind words. ❤️

Since it's a Saturday night, Riley didn't expect Matty to be there, but she is, and apparently, she's been notified that one of her agents has just been admitted to the infirmary.

“What happened?” she asks, a little breathlessly.

Riley just lowers herself onto one knee, puts both arms around Matty and weeps. Matty quickly wraps her own arms around her and holds her, cupping her head with one hand and rocking her ever so gently, looking at up at Bozer questioningly.

Bozer shifts his weight from one foot to the other: “Mac... it looks like he, er... like he overdosed on pills and alcohol.”

Matty's face falls. She seems incredulous: “Wh-”

Right then, Riley pulls back a little: “It's too much for him,” she whispers. “These past two years he went through hell, and now Jack...” Fresh tears run down her cheeks. “I'm so afraid, Matty. I don't want to lose him too...”

“Hey,” Matty says softly, stroking Riley's cheek. “He's in good hands here.” But she's pale, and she seems worried as well.

“Thanks,” Riley whispers, almost inaudible. “Sorry...”

“It's what family's for, huh?” Matty sounds fond. After a moment, she looks up at Bozer again: “Did you tell her yet?” she asks in an undertone. Bozer shakes his head.

“Tell me what?” Riley straightens up and wipes her eyes.

Matty regards her: “Since I couldn't reach Mac or you on the phone and tracking your signals said you were both at his place, I sent Bozer over to check on you.”

A small, unexpected smile steals into the corners of her mouth. “There've been a few unanticipated developments.” She puts a hand over mouth as if it's something she can't quite believe yet.

“What is it?” Riley asks impatiently. She doesn't get how Matty can smile in such a situation, and the fear she can't quell is like a fist in her gut.

Matty takes a deep breath: “While I was interrogating the last two of Vitez' accomplices earlier this week, one of them blabbed something out by mistake that got our attention. So I went in for another round with Vitez today, and I had help. Together, we got her to confirm what we wanted to know.”

“What if she lied?” Riley's tone is flat. She's got nothing for contempt for the woman who was responsible for Jack's death.

“She didn't,” a new voice now says behind them.

Riley and Bozer gasp: it's Cage.

They hug and exchange a few words, and Riley thinks that these are the news Matty meant earlier.

“What are you doing here?”

“Matty called me and said that she could really use my skills, and that it was urgent. And I had some time, so I hopped on a plane...”

“It's so good to see you!” Riley hugs her again.

“So what's that unexpected development?” she then asks.

Matty looks at Cage, then at Riley: “It turns out that Jack wasn't in that building anymore when the bomb went off. Vitez had her men apprehend him when she realized that people were on to her, since she thought she could use him for leverage later.”

Riley opens her mouth and closes it again. “But- she never said-”

“Those men later turned on her,” Cage says. “Sensing that she wasn't the kingpin any longer. Which seems to rankle with her quite a bit; she really hates how far she fell. Anyway, they took Jack with them, hoping to use him to their own advantage. Unfortunately for them, Jack's former team found them after the intel we gave them.”

Riley stares at her, lost for words. “Are you saying... are you saying he's alive?” Her voice is trembling.

Both Cage and Matty smile broadly: “Yes. Jack's alive.”

That's it. Riley's knees just give out, and she sinks to the floor, shaking, laughing and crying all at once. “ _He's alive_?” she repeats, sobbing. Bozer and Matty crouch down next to her and just hug her.

“Yes,” Matty whispers, unable to keep her own tears at bay. “He is.”

Riley's mind is reeling. “Is he okay?” she asks, once she's regained her composure.

“A little battered apparently, but he'll be alright.” Matty smirks.

Nodding, Riley closes her eyes for a moment. She hopes that it's true.

“He's on his way here,” Matty adds. “She should be here by tomorrow.”

New tears are running down Riley's cheeks at the notion that they did apparently get a miracle, that they'll be getting Jack back, and so soon.

Her thoughts stray back to Mac, who should have known this first. Who was so terribly lifeless in her arms earlier, in the car, and she just hopes that he'll make it through this, that the first thing she'll have to tell Jack won't be that he just missed his boy by a day.

The thought is as scary as it is morbid, but she can't forget how cold Mac's skin felt earlier, how he didn't respond anymore. Everything that happened has finally broken him, and while she really can't blame him, she feels terribly guilty for not having been there for him. Which is ironic, really, because she knows for a fact that Mac is also feeling guilty, for having missed Jack's calls. He's convinced that he could have helped, and it was haunting him that he didn't even get the chance. Riley tried and failed to talk him out of it, just like Bozer did, and Desi.

“Where are Desi and Russ?” she asks, now that she thinks of them.

“They've gone to Washington to rendez-vous with Jack's flight.” Matty sighs. “I know it should've been you and Mac, but I really couldn't put it off any longer, and as it turns out...” She glances at the double doors.

“It's okay,” Riley mutters. As long as Jack won't be alone on the plane. And she needs to be close to Mac right now.

As if on cue, the doors finally open and Dr. Sinderby comes out. Everyone scrambles to their feet, and even Cage visibly tenses.

“MacGyver did quite a number on himself there,” he says seriously. “He doesn't appear to have eaten anything lately, so the drugs were already in his system even before he expelled the contents of his stomach. It's a mix that includes temazepam and analgesics. I don't need to tell you that co-ingestion with alcohol is highly dangerous and presents quite a strain on the organs. Especially when one is underweight, which MacGyver has managed to achieve once again.”

Everyone is silent for a moment while the doc is letting this sink in.

“How's he doing?” Bozer eventually asks, his voice small.

“He hasn't regained consciousness; we have to take his substantial blood alcohol content into account. He's stable for now, but while we're rehydrating him intravenously, we'll be monitoring him closely, not least since he was having heart palpitations earlier, and we can't rule out any complications like seizures or respiratory problems yet.”

It all sounds terrible. Riley feels a hand in hers: it's Bozer, and she's grateful that he's there.

“Can we see him?”

“Yes; you know the drill though.” Dr Sinderby has long since given up on trying to reason with the agents in situations like this. Unless the circumstances are too dire, he almost always makes an exception.

So they all file into the cubicle in which Mac's lying, an oxygen mask over his face, an IV catheter in the back of his hand.

Riley reaches for the other one; it still doesn't feel warm enough somehow, so she wraps her fingers around it and just holds on to him, wanting him to know that she's there and give him a little warmth. Bozer puts a hand on Mac's shoulder, probably thinking along the same lines.

“This is not how I would have imagined to meet again,” Cage says softly.

Riley looks at Mac, whose face is still so terribly pale, and wishes the circumstances had been a little more in their favour. What is Jack going to say when he hears about this?

The notion that he's really coming back gives her a funny little jolt once more, as though she hasn't fully comprehended it yet. She just wishes Mac knew.

Around midnight, Matty and Cage leave; Bozer and Riley stay with Mac, anything else doesn't even seem feasible.

On the following morning, Mac opens his eyes just as Riley wakes up. She winces at the crick in her neck and really wishes she had had that snuggie with her; it's still early, but Bozer's already awake and gone to freshen up.

Riley is rolling her head to both sides but freezes when she catches some movement; it's Mac, whose hand is scrabbling over the blanket that's covering him, and she can see that he's blinking. In a heartbeat, she's on her feet, aching neck forgotten, and leans over him, reaching for his hand, which stills at the touch: “Mac,” she says softly.

He blinks again before his gaze settles on her, looking tired and drawn. Tenderly, Riley strokes over his hair with her free hand, not even thinking about it: “How're you feeling?”

He just groans, which is somewhat muffled by the oxygen mask. The fact that he doesn't reach up and try to remove it betrays how awful he probably actually feels.

“Do you remember what happened?”

“No...” His eyes are already closing again even as he shifts a little, trying to find a more bearable position. Riley had a really bad hangover once; in hindsight, it might actually have been alcohol poisoning. She vividly recalls how her body ached for days afterwards, how she couldn't find an even remotely comfortable position whether she was lying down or sitting up, and feeling queasy all the time. If Mac feels anything like that, he's got her full sympathies.

She regards him, wondering whether she should tell him about Jack. Right then however, he makes a pained little sound and finally lies still again, and she decides that it has got to wait; Mac's obviously in no condition to be confronted with such tremendous news.

Dr. Sinderby, while not yet content with his vitals, is not at all concerned because Mac barely woke up: “Sleeping is the best thing he can do right now,” he says. “Give his body time to recover while he's resting. I can only imagine how dreadful he must be feeling. And since his blood sugar's still too low, he's in the right place.”

A nurse is already putting two fresh bags on the IV stand, but at least the oxygen mask is being removed after that; Mac however doesn't react to it. Unhappily, Riley regards his pale face and realizes once more just how much she cares for him, which makes it so much more difficult to see him like this.

She wants to wrap herself around him and hide him from the world, be able to make it all better just by protecting him as best as she can. This is what Jack must have been feeling like all that time, she thinks. Apparently, it runs in the family.

Bozer brings coffee and bagels for breakfast, for which Riley is grateful. She didn't eat anything last night, after all; she's starving now. They're eating in the waiting area so as not to rouse Mac; who knows if he can stomach the scent of coffee right now. The last thing they want is to make it worse.

Bozer is quiet, and Riley has an inkling what this is about.

“We'll talk to him,” she says. “Hear what he's got to say. I don't believe that he wanted to harm himself.”

Bozer ponders this: “When we were kids, I always knew how to take care of him,” he eventually says. “It was easy. He's my little brother, and I always knew what to do.” He smiles absently, lost in a memory. “Now however,” he then adds, “it's more difficult. So much is happening... and I don't always know how to help him. I feel like I should've been there more.”

Riley nods: “Same here. But Mac's an adult now, Boze, not a kid. And he doesn't want to be treated like someone who can't handle their life.”

“I know. It's just that... ever since Jack left, he seems.... off kilter. It's not immediately obvious, but if you know him...”

“Yeah.” Riley smiles sadly. “I know what you mean. He always gives you the impression that he's in control. Apart from Codex. That was messed up.”

“Tell me about it.” Bozer looks down on his hands. “Another thing I could've handled better. I should've known that Mac wouldn't go rogue.”

Riley remains silent; it's something none of them likes to talk about.

Bozer takes a deep breath: “Well. It's too late to get upset about it now, right?”

“Absolutely.”

Right then, her phone rings. It's Desi. Riley puts the call on speaker:

“Morning,” Desi says. “Are you already up?”

Riley and Bozer exchange a look: this is probably not the best time to break the news about what happened.

“Yeah,” she therefore only replies. “I'm up.”

“Good. We tried to reach you yesterday, Mac too. You okay?”

“Yeah. Kinda in a funk... you know.”

“Well,” Desi sounds mischievous now. “I think I've got someone here to cheer you up.”

There's a bit of a rustling sound, and a moment later, a familiar voice says her name: “ _Riley_?”

“Jack!” Riley's voice gives out as she says it, and she absolutely can't help it that she's immediately tearing up again.

“Hey baby,” he says breathlessly, tenderly, his voice thin and tremulous.

“Jack,” she repeats in a choked whisper, missing him so badly right then; she really wants to hug him. “I love you,” she adds, because she's been wanting to say that for so long now. “I really miss you!”

Jack's sniffling: “I love you too, honey,” he says softly. “I'm sorry for everything!”

“Don't be,” she says, “just come home, okay?”

“Yeah, I'm... I'm doing that right now.” He sounds almost puzzled, as though he can't quite believe it's happening.

“I'm so glad,” she says, sobbing a little. “Tell the pilot to step on it, yeah?”

Sounding amused, Jack says he'll see what he can do, and then, inevitably, he asks about Mac.

Riley only hesitates for the fraction of a second: “To be honest, he's in Medical right now. He'll be fine, he just... had an allergic reaction to some meds.” There's no point in unnecessarily upsetting him, after all.

“What meds?”

Riley imploringly looks at Bozer, who points at his head.

“... For his headaches. He tried something new. Didn't work out so well.”

“Huh.” Jack sounds sceptical, but he seems to believe her: “He gonna be fine though?”

“Yeah, yeah. Sleeping it off now. Oh, and Bozer's here!”

“Jack,” Bozer says warmly. “My man! Can't wait to see you!”

“Likewise,” Jack says. “It's another four hours till wheels down though.”

“We'll be here,” Riley says, smiling.

“'kay. I'mma take a nap now. See you very soon, okay?”

She's trembling once they've hung up, and Bozer just hugs her again: “I really missed him,” he says softly.

Right then, Riley gets a text from Desi: _Mac okay_?

The same principle they applied earlier seems appropriate here: there's no point in making Desi worry unnecessarily. Technically, she and Mac currently seem to be in a prolonged “off again” phase. She deserves to know though, but not when she's still got four hours in the air ahead of her. Riley knows how it feels to go stir crazy during a flight.

So she just texts back that Mac will be fine. And can't stop herself from asking how Jack is doing.

Desi's answer is short: _Tough as usual_.

Apparently, Riley's not the only one who is putting off the truth a while longer for someone else's sake.

Riley, Bozer, Cage and Matty head up to the roof shortly before the helo arrives that picked Russ, Desi and Jack up at the airport. Doctor Sinderby and his medical team are also standing by with a wheelchair. Riley didn't have the heart to ask Matty what shape exactly Jack is in; she was nervous all morning, and now that he's about to come home, she's jittery enough as it is. At least it's not a gurney, she thinks.

And then they hear the approaching chopper. The sun is gleaming off its windshields, so they can't see its passengers very well, but as soon as it touches the ground, the door opens and Russ jumps out and holds out a hand. Holding on to him and being supported by Desi as well, Jack climbs out; his right arm is in a sling.

Riley feels her eyes welling up: half of his face is bruised, and he's definitely moving a little oddly, but he smiles: “Missed me?”

Riley is in his arms- well, his one good arm- a second later, and she can feel that he's trembling as much as she is as they hug each other tightly, or as tightly as she dares because she doesn't want to hurt him, and she's over the moon that this is really happening.

Eventually, after they've let go and the others have welcomed him as well, Dr. Sinderby clears his throat and motions at the wheelchair pointedly. Jack grimaces, but sits down in it without further discussion, which effectively serves to have Riley's guts twisting with worry again and it must have shown on her face, but Jack catches her hand: “I'm still in one piece, honey,” he assures her, “just a little banged up.” She squeezes his hand gratefully, momentarily unable to speak.

“Mac still sleeping?” Jack asks. Riley purposely doesn't look at the doctor: “Yeah,” she says. “Still sleeping.” She's already talked to him earlier, asking him not to tell Jack anything. She feels that this is something Matty or she should do, when the moment's right.

It takes another two hours until Jack is settled in a room, and when the others are finally allowed in (Dr. Sinderby just waving them through at this point), Jack is actually lying down and visibly flagging. His left arm and lower leg are in a cast and he looks so battered that Riley's heart constricts.

Wordlessly, she takes up position by his head and reaches for his good hand, mindful of the IV in his arm; the other one is still or again in a sling. Jack glances up at her with a smile that she returns, but she really wants to know what “a little banged up” actually means. Fortunately, Jack's given Dr. Sinderby the okay to brief them.

“I'm happy to report that Agent Dalton is going to be just fine. Eventually,” the doc says, while Jack just grins softly. The pain medication is making him a little loopy, but he's also just happy to be home, even if home means a bed in the infirmary for the time being.

“He's sustained several serious bruises which we're gonna keep an eye on, especially since once of them is directly above the kidneys,” Dr. Sinderby now continues.

Desi winces in sympathy.

The doc gives her a minuscule smile. “He's furthermore fractured his right ulna and his right tibia. None of which require surgery; however, along with the contusions and the overall state of neglect he is in, this just earned him a minimum stay of three to five days in here.”

Jack winks at Riley: “You'll break me out later, won't you, honey?”

Riley squeezes his hand: “I don't think so. I might bring you some pizza though.”

“Fair enough.”

When the doctor has left, Jack regards his team: “I'm so happy to see you,” he mutters fondly, and the others return the sentiment, but Riley dreads his next question, and of course, he wants to know about Mac.

Riley looks at Matty, whose face is grave, but she nods at Riley.

“Come on,” Jack now says, a bit of an edge in his voice despite his fatigue. “I know that something's up. If this was about an allergic reaction, he'd be in here right now.”

Nodding, Riley takes a deep breath, then she tells Jack, Russ and Desi what has happened on the previous day.

When she falls silent, Jack pushes back his blankets: “I want to see him.”

“No,” Riley and Bozer both press him back, eliciting a small hiss, but he complies for the moment; his currently rather tender ribs are making themselves known, along with all the other injuries he'd like to forget about.

Desi, who's gone very pale, briefly closes her eyes: “God,” she mutters, staggering backwards and easing herself into a chair in the corner. Matty goes to comfort her, while Russ looks crestfallen: “Do you really think he...” He breaks off.

“No,” Riley says quickly. “I don't. He just wasn't thinking straight anymore, and he...” She avoids looking at Jack right then. “It just hit him once more, I guess.”

Jack's expression is mutinous: “This is my fault. I need to see him,” he insists.

Near tears once more, Riley shakes her head: “It's not your fault, Jack,” she whispers.

Jack's eyes are filling as well: “Yes, it is.” His voice is small. “If I hadn't... If I...” He can't put it into words, which is something Riley has never ever witnessed before. She leans down and hugs him once more, or an approximation thereof.

“Please, Riles,” Jack whispers into her ear. “I need to see my boy. Help me.”

And Riley feels herself nod. This is the one thing she really can't deny him, after all.

TBC


	3. Dawn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tissues at the ready, guys! 
> 
> Apart from that- thank you again for the really lovely comments and/or leaving kudos!

Mac's been dozing exhaustedly for most of the day.

His head feels like it's in a vice, which is made worse every time he opens his eyes; the light is like daggers that are going straight for his brain. Apart from that, everything aches and he feels awful and still a little nauseous.

He doesn't remember what happened after he passed out on the kitchen floor, only that Riley was there at one point and that he threw up in the shower. The fact that he's in Medical means that it's been bad, and he probably deserves to feel this way.

Thing is though that he doesn't even care if it's bad. So he curls up as far as he can, which isn't much because he really feels as though he's lost a boxing match; whenever he moves wrong, the queasiness only increases, and his sore body protests. He's still got an IV too; he vaguely recalls Dr. Sinderby frowning down on him and checking his pupils, so it seems that he's not out of the woods yet. And he feels cold.

He went to the bathroom earlier and felt dreadfully shaky afterwards; even now, his muscles are still quivering and the simple task of pulling the blankets up a little bit higher seems impossible, therefore he doesn't even try, just wraps his arms around him as best as he can with the IV and huddles in on himself, letting his mind wander.

It feels less like sleep and more like drifting through a void in which time has no meaning and his senses are dulled.

For some time, someone's with him; Riley and Bozer, presumably. They were there earlier as well, but he lost track of time.

At one point, he's alone again, and that doesn't really make a difference; he's almost always alone these days. Except that it was nice when Riley was holding his hand. He's missed it, having someone to care for him so deeply that they'd be by his side in situations like these without fail.

He must have drifted off again, because the next time he wakes up, something's different. There's warmth around his hand once more; it feels familiar but unexpected.

With a bit of an effort, he forces his eyes open; the light is still unpleasant, but not as badly as before. He blinks until they feel less gritty and the blurry shape next to the bed comes into focus.

After a brief if heated debate with the doc and Riley backing him up, Jack has gotten his way. He's now sitting in a wheelchair, his IV pole behind him, wrapped in a blanket, keeping vigil by Mac's bed like he's done countless times. And yet it's different. It hurts to see his boy like this, hurts even more to think that he's indirectly caused this. That Mac was so desperate that he almost killed himself.

Jack cringes at the thought: he can't believe that Mac did it on purpose, and two years ago, anyone who suggested otherwise would have gotten an earful. Now, Jack can't even be sure.

He leans on the mattress a little; Riley has pushed the railing down so Jack has unhindered access. With his good hand, he's holding Mac's, needing the contact after having missed him for so long. They talked on the phone a few times, which only made it worse; walking away from his kids was the hardest thing he ever had to do, and now he feels responsible that Mac's lying here, looking wan and... flat, somehow. Insubstantial, like one of those see-through butterflies. Like those, Mac has always been stronger than one might have assumed, but now...

Riley has told him about everything that happened in the past two years, and as Jack regards Mac's beloved features now he thinks it's no surprise that he finally reached this point. He can only guess how desperate Mac must have been to let it come to this, whether he did it on purpose or not.

He's pulled out of his musings when Mac moves, if ever so slightly, and then he begins to blink. Jack doesn't say anything; not because he doesn't want to, but because he can't. His throat tightens up and his eyes are prickling with unshed tears. Helplessly, he watches as Mac, once he's opened his eyes, looks at him and then stares as though he's seeing an apparition.

“Hey, Carl's Junior,” Jack eventually manages.

Mac, who has gone beyond pale, is still looking at him wide-eyed, but now, tears are running down his face.

“I'm really here,” Jack whispers, because his voice just doesn't obey. “It's a long story... but Vitez didn't kill me. She tried, mind you, but in the end she didn't.”

“Jack,” Mac eventually breathes, sounding terribly grief-stricken. “I'm so sorry...” His face contorts as he starts to cry, and it's breaking Jack's already bruised heart. He swore to always protect his boy, but he failed him instead.

He scrambles to his feet and leans over the bed as far as he can, ignoring the twinges of pain in his body or that he lost the blanket just now; it doesn't matter. All that matters is his kid, who doesn't seem to have understood that this isn't just a figment of his imagination but that Jack is really here. The latter pulls his arm out of the sling so that he can take Mac's hand with that one; it hurts, but that doesn't matter either.

With his good hand, he gently strokes over Mac's hair: “No, _I'm_ sorry,” he whispers, his voice thick with tears, “I'm so sorry I left you too...”

They're both shaking by now and unable to speak, weighed down by everything they had to endure recently, every missed moment and every lost opportunity.

While Jack knows that a lot of that darkness will soon be behind them however, Mac is still caught up in it, and for once, Jack has no idea how to help him. He's so exhausted, he can barely think. The past few days in particular have been rough, and he still feels an echo of real fear. For quite a while, he wasn't sure he'd make it out of there alive, and that's still spine-chilling in hindsight.

And now this.

When Riley comes in some time later, having gone to take a shower and change into fresh clothes in the meantime, she's greeted with an unexpected sight: Jack has crawled onto the bed with Mac. He's taken his arm out of the sling and put it around Mac protectively, and they're both fast asleep.

Jack must be cold, but at least he's remembered to pull the IV stand close enough to the bed.

Riley picks up his blanket and covers him with it. He doesn't react, which is no surprise, considering how knackered he must be. Riley looks from him to Mac: for the first time today, he seems relaxed; before, he appeared tense even while he was napping.

For a long while, she just stands there, regarding them; as she's doing so, she feels a kind of peace engulfing her that she once knew but had all but forgotten.

Eventually, she leaves the room to find Dr. Sinderby and talk to him once more. It's the least she can do.

Some time in the small hours, Mac wakes up. The room is dimly lit, and opening his eyes doesn't seem like such a task anymore.

He's disappointed to find himself alone in the bed, because he had such a vivid dream of Jack being back. He looked terribly battered but he was alive, and Mac can still feel his touch. He takes a shuddering breath, wondering if the pain will ever diminish. Dulling it with alcohol worked for a while, but now it's back even worse, because Jack was here with him, and now he's gone again.

“You didn't dream it,” a soft voice says.

Moving's still an effort, so Mac just rolls his head sideways: it's Riley, who's curled up in a reclining chair. She gets to her feet now, regarding him as she sits down on the mattress by his hip: “Jack's back,” she says, unable to hide her elation about this despite everything. “Vitez had him abducted from that building before it blew up, and that went sideways. Long story.” She smiles, running a hand over her face: so much has happened since she's found Mac in the kitchen.

“I... I didn't just imagine it?” Mac still seems to be wrapping his head around this newfound knowledge.

“No. He even crawled in with you. He only just left an hour ago, and only because the night nurse was very adamant.”

“He's injured.” Mac's voice is far from its usual strength, but he sounds worried.

“Yeah. Nothing life-threatening, just... painful. Especially if you don't heed the doctor's orders. He would have stayed here nevertheless, you know how he is.” Riley smiles. “You're going to be in the same room tomorrow though. Doc promised.”

Mac's eyes are moist: “Thank God,” he just whispers, barely audible, not meaning the room.

“Yeah.” Riley smile deepens despite a few fresh tears. “Man, I feel like I'm doing nothing but crying,” she says, making light of the situation.

Mac however regards her with a frown: “You should have gone home. Catch some sleep.”

“I should,” she agrees. “But I couldn't.” Her gaze is tender now: "So how are you feeling?"

"Been better," he admits.

"Yeah, I figured." Riley sounds sympathetic.

At that, Mac averts his gaze: he doesn't deserve her sympathy. “I'm sorry,” he says softly. “For putting you through this. I didn't mean... I didn't...” He doesn't even know how to say it.

Riley reaches for his hand: she didn't intend to get into it with him now, but Mac seems to need to get it out. “What happened?” she therefore asks.

Mac looks around the room before his gaze lands on her again: “I was tidying up and kept coming across Jack's stuff,” he says, his voice still halting at the name. “It hurt so much... I just couldn't take it anymore.” He pauses. “So I grabbed the nearest bottle there was and went for it.”

Riley nods, wishing she could have been there for him.

“Still doesn't explain the pills though.”

“Pills?”

“Yeah... those for your headaches and sleeping pills.”

Mac blinks, frowning: “I don't remember taking any pills,” he says faintly. “I only know I had a headache...” He falls silent, and Riley thinks that she's been right all along; it was an accident, most likely.

Mac however seems shocked: “Riles- do you think... I wanted to kill myself?”

Riley feels close to tears again. “No,” she says honestly. “I don't. But whatever happened, happened.” She squeezes his hand. “I get how you were feeling, Mac, and why. But I can't lose you too. Or, not 'too',” she corrects herself; it's still so new. “I can't lose you, period.”

Mac holds on to her hand just as tightly: “I'm a mess,” he whispers.

Riley bends forward to hug him: “You're also my best friend,” she whispers back. “I love you. And I wanna be there for you, even when things are bad. Like you were there for me. I'm sorry I was so caught up in my own grief that I didn't see yours.”

Mac slowly wraps his arms around her as well: “I love you too,” he mumbles nasally. “Stop apologizing, 'kay? You just saved my life.”

“I didn't.”

“Without you, I'd probably have choked on my own vomit or something.”

“Ew. In that case, I totally did save your life.”

With a small smile, Riley pulls back, regarding Mac and seeing all his susceptibilities at once. He's precious, this boy, and she's just glad that things will hopefully be looking up from now on.

“He's alive,” she then whispers. “He's come back to us at the turn of the tide.”

The corners of Mac's mouth actually quirk up a little at that, and it's like seeing the sun for the first time after weeks of rain.

On the following morning, Mac still feels like someone's turned him inside out and then back, but he insists that he's well enough to get up, which only elicits an amused laugh from Elaine, the nurse who's taking some blood from him, measuring his blood pressure and noting down his vitals: “I've seen you totter to the bathroom just now,” Elaine says. “It's like Godzilla approaching Tokyo.”

Mac frowns: he wants to go see Jack at once, but Elaine tells him that Jack's not even awake yet, and before Mac can argue that that's not a reason _not_ to go see him, Bozer enters his cubicle, carrying a bag of fresh clothes and necessities for Mac.

“You're gonna be moved into the same room with Agent Dalton,” Elaine says. “I'll come and get you when he's awake and decent. And remember: no wandering around for you just yet. Doctor's orders."

Bozer's relieved to see his friend sitting up; Mac looks like death warmed over, but this is still such an improvement compared to the previous day.

Bozer barely slept last night, wondering if he could have done something to prevent it. And he wonders why Mac didn't talk to him, like they used to do. But then, ever since Afghanistan, it was Jack Mac had confided in, if at all, and later, Desi. Or so Bozer assumed. Still. Mac's his little brother, and things will have to change.

He regards Mac sternly, not even asking how he's doing: “Okay, so... If you're well enough to be up, you're well enough for a talk.”

Mac has actually anticipated something like that. And he's also had a talk with Dr. Sinderby, who was even less inclined to be lenient than Mac's friends: he told him in no unmistakable terms that no matter how the situation came about, he'll have to take a psych eval once he's recovered, and that there'll be consequences if something like this happens again.

“I'm not saying that in my capacity as your physician,” he added gruffly. “But as someone who's grown fond of you despite the fact that you're single-handedly responsible for all my overtime.”

Mac was touched.

Once Bozer's done lecturing Mac about drug abuse and what his parents and the extended family are going to do if they ever found out, and about the possible treatments he googled, he hugs Mac: one moment he's talking about his aunt Phyllis and therapy, the next he just grabs Mac and wraps his arms around him.

Mac feels too thin ins his arms, but it's Bozer himself who's shaking: “What it boils down to is this,”he says softly. “Never do that again. Promise you won't.”

“I promise,” Mac replies softly, closing his eyes: Bozer has always been there for him. How could he forget what a punch in the gut something like this must be for him?

“I'm sorry,” he mutters.

“I know.” Bozer takes a deep breath and finally lets go of him.

Turns out Bozer isn't the only one who's got a bone to pick with him though; Matty's next. She doesn't yell at him but it's a close thing. She also mentions the psych eval and threatens to suspend him from duty and make him go and see a shrink, but just before she turns to leave, she pauses: “I'll take you off the rota for as long as Jack needs to recover. If that's alright with you.”

What Mac doesn't know is that she's already talked to Dr. Sinderby: “I know that something like this usually requires more than a psych eval,” she said. “But we've got to take the circumstances into account.”

The doctor regarded her over the rim of his glasses: “Meaning that Dalton's back to keep his boy out of harm's way?”

“Yes. Now that he's back, Mac will be alright.”

“I thought you'd say something like that.” The doctor gives her a brief smile. “Well, on your head be it. You know them best.”

Matty returned the smile: “Yes, and I'll take on full responsibility for them.”

Sinderby nodded: “Keep an eye on Dalton, will you? PTSD can manifest in all kinds of shapes. He shouldn't try to tough it out on his own in case it happens.”

“You're forgetting one thing, Ed. It's not only that Mac's gotten Jack back but also vice versa.” Matty's smile deepened: “They'll take care of each other.”

Once Matty's gone, Mac slowly gets to his feet and puts on the hospital issued dressing gown. He'd have liked to put on some socks too, since his feet are cold, but bending down isn't really an option yet, considering that he's still got a headache going on and everything.

He's still feeling queasy too, but he can't wait any longer; he needs to see Jack, now, and he's gotten rid of the IV earlier, after all.

So he slips through the curtain on bare feet and makes his way down the hall, where the rooms are. Jack's name is right on the first door, so Mac opens it quietly and peers inside: no staff around. Quietly, he closes it behind himself and approaches the bed.

He's shaking as his gaze falls onto the occupant of the bed, and not only from being up: it's really Jack, and he's alive; his chest is rising and falling in a regular rhythm.

Mac's eyes are filling again, he can't help it. It's like finally having woken up from a nightmare.

He comes to stand next to the bed and just looks at his friend. The left half of his face is black and blue, and one arm and one leg are in a cast. There are no more injuries Mac can see however, and Riley said it's nothing life-threatening.

Almost timidly, Mac reaches out to touch Jack, his hand trembling. What if he's still only dreaming all of this?

But Jack feels real, his skin reassuringly warm, and Mac's so relieved that his knees turn into jelly. He leans against the bed and then realizes that he actually needs to sit down. Right; Dr. Sinderby said something about his blood sugar still being too low, which sometimes happens when he forgets to eat. This time however, the cause is more severe. Mac still doesn't recall taking any pills, but he is also certain that he wouldn't have taken them with the intention to end his life. At least he hopes so.

The past two weeks have been such a blur that it's hard to say, actually. He blinks, rubbing a shaky hand over his eyes: he's still tired. Once Riley left last night, and he's glad that he could finally convince her to go and get some rest, he was too agitated to go back to sleep.

He would have gotten up and gone to see Jack right then, but Riley said Jack had been absolutely knackered, and he didn't want to risk waking him.

Now that he's looking at him, he can see that she was right. There are dark circles underneath Jack's eyes, and he seems exhausted even in his sleep. But it's Jack, and Mac can't wait to talk to him. For now, he'll just wait.

At one point, his eyes are beginning to close, so he just pulls himself all the way up onto the mattress and stretches out next to Jack, on his left side. Jack doesn't wake up, but he lifts his arm in his sleep and puts it around Mac, who hesitates only a second before he nestles against him. A few times, they've snuggled up like this before, usually in extraordinary situations, for example when they had to share their body heat for warmth.

This does count as an extraordinary situation, Mac thinks groggily, and besides, his feet are icy by now. Surreptitiously, he pushes them under the blankets. He knows that this is okay not only because they've been apart for so long: Jack's always been more of a dad to him than his own, after all. So he presses his cheek against Jack's chest, listening to his heartbeat, which is as strong and steady as ever, and suddenly it hits him: this is real, Jack isn't dead, and he's back for good. Presumably, and if Mac has got anything to say about it.

Happiness wells up in him, for the first time since... he doesn't even know.

He curls one hand into the blanket that's covering the man whose alleged death almost broke him and closes his eyes.

They are both woken by a number of voices.

“... in here!” That's Elaine.

“Why am I not surprised?” Dr Sinderby sounds vaguely amused.

“I specifically told him that I'd come and get him as soon as Agent Dalton was awake.”

“Yeah well, unless you tie MacGyver down, he'll just ignore something like that if he can or if he thinks he knows better.”

Mac blinks and slowly sits up; the world immediately begins to spin a little, but then there's a firm hand on his shoulder: it's the doc, who supports him to keep him from keeling over.

“And this is why you should listen to what I'm telling you,” he says. “This is an infirmary, not a slumber party!”

Mac blinks, looking from him to Jack, who's taking a bit longer to wake up. When he opens his eyes and sees Mac, his tired features immediately light up: “ _Mac_ ,” he mutters softly, and there's so much love and affection in that one word that Mac begins to shake with relief.

“You're not gonna collapse on me now, are you?” Dr. Sinderby asks, which Mac can't answer right away because his throat's so tight all of a sudden that he couldn't speak if he tried, and admittedly, he feels weak as a kitten.

Right then, Elaine pushes his bed into the room and parks it next to Jack's, and the doctor helps Mac to his feet. He's rather wobbly and actually relieved to be lying down again. He's a little cold now, so he keeps the dressing gown on for the time being, but all that's just a footnote: his attention is on Jack, and he keeps looking at him until Elaine closes the curtain between the beds for privacy; in the meantime, Dr. Sinderby takes Mac's blood pressure once more, ausculcates his heart and checks his pupils and his reactions.

“Your blood test results from earlier show much improvement,” he then says. “We'll try to reboot you today. If you manage to keep some solid food down and your blood pressure remains stable, you can go home tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow? Why not tonight?”

“Judging from what I saw earlier and your history, I believe you'll rest more easily with Dalton around.”

“Dalton seconds that,” Jack's voice comes from behind the curtain.

Mac looks sheepish, but there's a smile in his eyes. Dr. Sinderby notices with satisfaction that MacGyver seems much more compliant in his friend's presence. Nothing has changed about that, then. The doc admittedly is happy for them, not least since he's known them since they started working for DXS, and while they may not be the easiest patients, he's gotten rather fond of them and their relationship. He's got a son himself, and he sees a lot of parallels in their behaviour, even if with Dalton and MacGyver, one might go so far as to call it co-dependency.

The moment the doctor and the nurse have left, Mac and Jack scramble to their feet again, and they are in each other's arms before the door's even closed. This time, neither of them speaks and there's no manly back-clapping either; they just hold on to each other tightly, trembling and crying again but happy to have each other back.

When they eventually pull apart because Jack's trembling from the exertion of being upright (and balancing on one foot) and Mac's not far behind, Jack tugs Mac over to his bed so that they can sit down: his leg isn't thanking him for getting up and putting a strain on it, after all.

Turning towards him, Jack next looks Mac over: “I love you, kiddo,” he says softly, his voice tremulous. “I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you. And I'm sorry that this is how we meet again. In the hospital wing.”

Mac takes a shuddering breath: “I love you too,” he replies, still sounding choked. “And I was going to tell you the same.”

He hesitates. "You okay?"

"Not yet," Jack replies gently. "You know how it is."

Mac nods; he can imagine what Jack went through mentally.

"You?" Jack now asks, because the shadows are still there, in Mac's drawn face and the way his shoulders are slumping.

"Same." There's no point lying about it, after all; not to Jack.

"We'll get there, huh?" Jack squeezes Mac's shoulder.

"Yeah." Mac regards him; his eyes are filling once more at the notion that there's a _we_ again.

"I guess you'll want your Metallica t-shirts back, huh?" he manages.

They both laugh somewhat tearfully.

"Yeah," Jack mutters. "I do."

He fidgets a little: “Listen, hoss,” he then says, and his next words come out in a rush. “I'll not leave you again, ever. Seriously. It took me all of this to realize it, but... I was stupid. And I'm done with being stupid. Or losing any more time. And I thought... well, I had some time to ponder matters yesterday, so if you wanted me to... I mean, not that I wanna _impose_ or anything, and it might be a little early for that anyway, _and_ you're a grown man, but... since you're my kid in every respect but the biological one... I'll gladly adopt you. I mean it. I thought I'd just say it. _Ask_ , I mean. Ask you.”

He ducks his head. “I'm sorry if this is insensitive?”

Stunned, Mac looks at him, and Jack half expects him to laugh it off, but he wraps his arms around Jack once more instead and presses his face against his neck; Jack can feel the moisture from his eyes there, and Mac's breath is warm against his skin: “Yes, please.”

Jack gasps: “Did... did you just agree? Just like that?”

Despite himself, Mac chuckles, slowly straightening up again.

He wipes a hand over his eyes, trying to find the right words, then looks at Jack a soberly: “Losing you made me realize a few things,” he says softly. “I miss my parents too, but that's nothing compared to how it felt to think _you_ were...” He breaks off. “I barely remember my mom, but I think she'd be okay with it. And my father... you know. He tried, for some time, but... he's never been like you. I'd be lucky to have a dad like you.”

Jack pulls Mac closer and pecks him on the temple: “I'm honored,” he says softly.

They stay like that, letting everything sink in and being just glad to be reunited when Elaine comes in with a breakfast trolley: “I _should_ have tied you down,” she chides, ushering Mac back to bed. “And I will, if you keep getting up!”

“Better listen to the nice lady, son,” Jack says, and Mac grins; he's knackered now and feeling so shaky and overall sore that he's actually glad to be lying down again, but he's also elated that the term _son_ now holds so much more weight when Jack's using it. Present tense, too.

“So... Can I have a dog?” Mac asks, once Elaine's left again.

Jack chuckles: “As long as you let me bunk at your place, you can have every animal you want, kiddo.”

“That's so cool!”

They know they're going to talk about everything that happened in the meantime at one point, and they both have questions, but not now.

Now, they just need to be with each other for a while.

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “He's come back to us at the turn of the tide.” is in reference to The Lord of the Rings, of course.


	4. An Ending + GTO + Phoenix

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final part! This story had a lot of traffic so far, please let me know what you think!
> 
> I loved working on this and I realize that this fic is very important to me, so once more, thanks to those who left kudos/comments, it means a lot!

All day, they get a steady stream of visitors. The entire team comes by, Cage as well; she's actually saying goodbye already, but she promises to keep in touch.

Riley stays for most of the afternoon, having brought Jack a few clothes and stuff he might need. Jack's still exhausted, but they talk a lot nevertheless.

“I can sleep when I'm d... you know,” he says, earning himself a slap from his girl.

“Too early to joke about it?”

“You can _never_ joke about it,” Riley says, but then she squeezes his hand: “I'm so happy that you're here!”

In the afternoon, Elaine checks Mac's vitals again and says he can get up and move around for a bit. He's feeling less queasy now, and walking isn't such a tottery affair any more. He has no intention to leave the room though.

In the early evening, Desi comes by; she seems strangely subdued, so Mac and she do go outside to talk.

“I need to ask,” she says, once they're alone. “Did you take those pills on purpose?”

Mac doesn't know what he expected, but not that.

“ _No_ ,” he says, a little appalled. “At least I don't think so. I don't remember.”

Desi regards him, then she nods: “I'm so sorry I wasn't there,” she says softly. “Thing is... I probably would have been, if things had been right between us.”

Mac opens his mouth and closes it again. He's apologized so often by now that he has no idea what else he could say, or do, to convince her that he's sorry.

“It's never going to be right between us again, is it?” he asks flatly, because who's he kidding, and if he's honest with himself, he still doesn't think he had a choice. He wishes she could have understood that.

Desi's eyes are brimming: “I'm sorry,” she says. “I'd want it to, but... this once more showed me that I'm too easily ready to think the worst of you. And that's not fair towards you.”

Mac nods tiredly; somehow, he can't even be very sad, because deep down, he knew that this was going to happen. Every time she left him, he felt terribly lost and forlorn, but not now. Before, it felt like standing on shifting ice; now, he's on solid ground.

“Will you going to be alright?” Desi asks.

“Yeah.” Mac gives her a small smile. “You?”

“Yeah. I'm... not sure whether I should look for a new job though.”

“You really shouldn't,” Mac hears himself say. “Unless you think you won't be able to work with me any longer.”

“ _Working_ together has never been the problem, has it?” Desi says feebly.

Mac nods: for some reason, she was always able to trust his abilities, if not his person.

“We're probably going to be okay,” he says with more conviction than he feels; this is hard on her too, after all.

They hug each other before Desi leaves, and this time, he doesn't feel lost at all. A little sad, maybe, but it's bearable and mingled with tentative relief: they've been running in circles, and he's tired of it.

Riley raises her eyebrows when he comes back in alone: “Desi already gone?”

“Yeah,” Mac says, realizing that he's actually feeling a little lighter. “Turns out we just... made a decision.”

Inclining her head, Riley regards him: “I'm sorry,” she says softly.

“It's okay,” Mac says, sitting down on his bed.

Jack looks from Riley to him: “Am I missing something here?”

“It's a long story,” Mac begins, but Jack shrugs, then he winces: “ _Ow_. Yeah, well- it ain't like we got somewhere else to be, right?”

Mac snorts somewhat resignedly, but Jack looks so expectantly at him that he climbs all the way onto his bed, leans back and starts telling Jack about Desi: it's a luxury, after all, to have time with the people one loves.

Even after Mac's stopped talking and Jack's stopped trying to gauge just how much damage the whole matter and everything else that happened have done, after Elaine has come in with their evening meals and told Riley not to keep her patients up for too long, Riley can't quite bring herself to leave, and Jack's fine with it. Mac's dozed off again even before he finished his dinner, and Jack'd like some talking company right now.

He pats the space next to him which Mac occupied earlier: “Wanna come closer?” he asks, and Riley doesn't hesitate. She climbs onto the mattress and settles down with her head on Jack's shoulder, his good arm around her.

“This okay?” she asks, trying not to be heavy.

“Perfect,” Jack mutters, his cheek against her forehead; this is like an ointment for his battered psyche.

For a while, they're silent, then Riley sighs: “Jack?”

“Yes, baby?”

“I'm sorry I was being an ass to you after you and Mom split up.”

After a moment, Jack chuckles very softly: “You were still a kid, honey. Nothing to apologize for.”

“I was old enough to know what I was doing,” Riley insists.

“'kay.” Jack presses a kiss on her hair. “In that case, all's forgiven. It's such a long time ago.”

“Yeah.” Riley exhales shakily. “Still. It made me realize how true it is when people say you only know what you had once it's gone.”

“But I'm not gone anymore,” Jack says, rubbing his thumb over her arm. “I know what you mean though. I missed you all so much I thought I'd go crazy. It just ain't the same without you guys.”

“Right back at ya,” Riley mutters.

She glances at Mac, who's sound asleep now, probably for the first time in two weeks: “We really did a shitty job of taking care of him,” she then adds, unintentionally saying it out loud. Jack immediately knows what she means though.

He looks over to the other bed too: “It's not that easy when so much keeps happening,” he says after a moment. “And when the person you want to protect maybe doesn't let you. And keep pretending they're fine.”

Riley considers this: “Maybe we just didn't try hard enough. During the time the Phoenix was shut down, we barely kept in touch. Everyone was so caught up in their own stuff...” She sounds guilty.

“Hey,” Jack mutters, squeezing her gently. “Nobody's perfect. Except maybe my man Bruce. But there's no use beating yourself up about the past. Can't change a thing about that now, right?”

Reluctantly, Riley nods.

“Yeah, thought so. Better to try'n look ahead instead.”

He glances over at Mac again; despite what he just said, his own feeling of guilt is still weighing heavily on him too, but he'll have to live with that, and he'll do his darnedest to get his boy back on track. And then keep him there.

“How do you feel about getting a little brother, by the way?” he now asks Riley.

“What?”

“Well... thing is... I'mma adopt Mac.”

“Really?” Riley lifts her head to look at Jack. “Like... legally?”

“Yeah. Asked him right away, and he said yes.”

Riley considers this: “You're a good man, Jack Dalton,” she then all but whispers, because damn it, she's tearing up again.

“Yeah, I figured... everybody needs someone they belong to, and since he's an orphan now...” Jack's eyes are glinting as well.

“I'm so happy he agreed,” he whispers.

Riley cranes her neck so that she can kiss him: “Me too.”

She regards Jack a moment longer, then she inclines her head: “I've always wanted a brother. Although...” She breaks off again. It's not so easy to talk about this.

A hint of mischief steals into Jack's gaze: “Although you're not that sad that Desi and he ain't together anymore?”

Riley is speechless: “How did you... is it that obvious?”

“No, dummy.” Jack smiles fondly. “I know you, remember?”

“Right,” Riley says weakly.

“Don't worry, your secret's safe with me.”

Riley lies down again: “It's not as if it's ever gonna happen anyway,” she murmurs.

Jack smiles: “Give it time.”

“Great,” Riley mutters. “Everybody always says that.”

“Yeah, well... It's been proven to be valuable advice.”

“In this case, I wouldn't be so sure it'll work.”

“Huh. You're forgetting one thing.”

“Which is?”

“Okay, two things, actually. One: I'm much older and therefore much wiser than you, and secondly: I know Mac too.”

Riley rolls her eyes, but she smiles. “You certainly always knew how to make me feel better,” she mutters.

Then, remembering something, she fumbles around in her jacket pocket: “Here. I almost forgot.”

She pulls out the keys to the GTO and puts them on Jack's chest.

He peers down on them: “What about them?”

“I'm giving them back.”

“Car's yours now.”

“But-”

“Did you like driving it?”

“Did I _like_ it _?_ I _loved_ it!”

“See- then you keep it.”

“Jack!” Riley lifts her head again. “Are you sure?”

“Absolutely.” Jack smiles at her. “As long as you take me along for a ride once in a while.”

“Thanks,” Riley breathes, kissing him again. “I'll take good care of it.”

“You better.” Jack sounds content.

"Jack?" Riley asks once more.

"Hm?"

"You gonna tell me what happened? In Croatia, I mean, and... during the past few days?"

Jack briefly closes his eyes: it's something he doesn't want Riley to know, and yet. She's a spy now, she can be tough if she has to. In this regard, he's got to stop treating her as if she's still thirteen years old, and inwardly, he's proud that she wants to talk about it with him.

"Sure," he therefore says. "If you wanna hear it."

"I do." Riley sounds tremulous. "Once you're up to it."

"'kay." Jack smiles a little painedly. "Think it can wait a bit, though?"

"Yeah, of course," Riley mutters, feeling a little guilty for reminding him.

Jack however hums: "Thank you for asking, honey."

In the early hours of the following day, Mac startles out of sleep: “Jack!”

“'m here, kid,” Jack mumbles groggily. To his relief, Mac's ragged breathing soon evens out again; it's only a minor disturbance in the force.

In the dim light of the room, and Jack is actually rather glad that it's not completely dark, he beholds Mac for a while: they've got new scars physically and on their souls, both of them; new stuff for nightmares. None of them will have to go through any of it alone though.

They've admittedly had their ups and downs, but if the past two years and all of the time he's worked with Mac really have taught him anything, it's that his place is with his amazing, lovely, somewhat star-crossed little bomb-nerd. Who has felt like a son to him pretty much from the beginning, once they had gotten to know each other. Who needs someone to look after him whether he realizes it or not. Someone to be at home with and keep the darkness at bay.

Well. Depending on how things are going with Riley, Jack may not be the only one in the long run, and apart from that, there's the rest of the team, of course, and Bozer.

From what Jack gathered, their logical family temporarily fell out with one another during the Codex crisis, and apparently, they had little contact while the Phoenix was shut down.

Things seem to be looking up now, however; Riley said that it's actually Jack's alleged death that brought them closer together again. And most recently, their shared concern for Mac, of course.

Jack sighs; destruction and havoc usually precede something new, which is exactly what the Phoenix stands for, after all. He's glad to have this reassuringly large number of people that counts as family, even that Russ guy because Riley considers him alright, and Jack doesn't doubt their strength and ability as a unit.

As for Mac- from now on, Jack'll have his back again, as always, no matter what else is happening; Jack is going to watch over his boy, just as it should be.

 _His boy_. Who looks impossibly young in his sleep right now, but already less inanimate and pallid. He'll be alright.

Closing his eyes again, Jack smiles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not against Desi, on the contrary. I just don't think she and Mac make sense together, and that prolonged stringing along while he keeps apologizing is just silly, in my opinion, and doing neither of the characters justice.  
> The MacRiley thing is rather new to me- I'd have been okay with it if Mac had found someone else or no one at all, but now I think they'd be cute together. However, it's not a must or even a big deal for me (MacDalton is also something I love), so I'm content with just waiting to see what's going to happen. Ever since Jack, canon is something I can live without, after all...

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I'm not a Native Speaker, therefore I apologize for any mistakes!
> 
> This story has four parts and is completely written, I'm just doing some minor editing now. The medical side might be wildly inaccurate, despite doing research, but then again, that's not very different on the show. ;D


End file.
